by The President



released July 16, 2010

Roofless Records #8

each copy packaged with a one-of-a-kind oil pastel drawing by The President


complete album (15 tracks) is collected on EXPERIENCE SOBRIETY Deluxe Edition

all songs by The President (Jason Handelsman)

recorded @ Planet White House immediately following the Miami Heat's acquisition of LeBron James



all rights reserved


The President Miami, Florida


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Track Name: Gary Cohen and the Makeout Sluts
money money money money
gotta make a despoit
hustlin hustlin hustlin hustlin
gotta rick ross it
skeletons skeletons skeletons
coming out of my closet
my lawyer
gary cohen
taking care of that lawsuit

gary cohen and the makeout sluts
guess what
chicken butt

this is gary cohen
how ya doin
where ya goin
whatcha knowin
which way is the wind a-blowin
this is gary cohen

got a d.u.i.
you're in a hot mess
stopped at a checkpoint
policeman says, "you're under arrest"

before you take that breathalyzer test
before you take that breathalyzer test
gary cohen and the makeout sluts
Track Name: Rachel Goodrich
the president gave rachel goodrich his pick
and she strummed her guitar
poppin' champagne at a championship
and eatin' caviar
the president gave rachel goodrich his pick
and it started to rain
she sang a song about stickin' a corkscrew in someone's heart
and i got struck by lightning

she finished her song
stepped off of the stage
extended her arm and said,
"here's your pick...but...you said i could have it"
i said, "please keep it bay-buh"
and she stuck it in her yellow pocket

i love the taste of sweat
i love miami velvet
i'm about as high as you can get
i love the taste
Track Name: Free Weezy
miles davis
bitches brew
blood inside your candy stew
blood all over everywhere
there's dried blood in lil wayne's hair
it's runnin down his nose
it's on his face
it's the thrill of the kill
and not the chase
i taste the blood
i lick the blood
in the old testament
there was a flood
new cycle of your period
knock knock knockin' on heaven's door
there's blood all over the bathroom floor
blood all over the shower tile
blood in the street for miles
and miles and miles
miles davis
kind of blue
Track Name: I Love Miami
i love miami
miami is separate from florida
miami is separate from los estados unidos
miami is it's own magic planet
and on this planet
is an undiscovered country
i love miami
i was abducted by aliens
and taken to miami
i love miami
Track Name: Bruja
do i look like a bruja?
with these reptilian scales on my face i think i'm lookin like a bruja
do i look like a bruja?
with my very long hair i think i'm lookin like a bruja